I’ve been to the mountains of Kenya, orphanages of Mexico, swam in crystal clear Bohemaian beaches and romantic cityscapes of Toronto. I’ve dreamed of moving across the world and traveling but recently find myself at HOME.
I don’t say this with disdain or regret, for me this is a privilege. It is unexpected. It is a Calling.
I remember walking on Spelman College’s Campus, full of the smartest minority women on the planet, stepping into the Harriet Tubman Concourse, watching black girls full of career dream wonder chat about their life and future plans.
Every week I came to talk to one girl about her aspirations, about life, about her relationship with GOD.
Soon this grew into a long list of women I had a privilege to know. They all had aspirations any parent would be proud of, but something was missing.
They didn’t seem to have a grid for what comes first- God, Family, Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships. The Life Stuff that really makes you happy.
They seemed to think, “I have to choose. It’s either my career or being a family woman. And you aren’t going to limit me to family. I’m not going to be this frumpy woman staying at home frustrated I never lived my dreams while my husband goes out and has a blast living his.”
Well I have news for you my sister, we are called to it ALL.
I realized this as I read the Word and saw the example set for us. Women like Deborah were bold leaders. Leaders of men, women, children, political leaders, military sargents and nations.
They were wives of powerful men, real estate gurus, mothers, cooks, fashionistas, influencers, and warriors.
I remember sitting down talking to many of these women, who were deep down inside terrified of losing their call to the workplace or mission field to the HOME.
And then I would see HOPE. My mother, working throughout the day, cooking meals, hiring cleaners, taking us to sporting events, sewing gowns for entire wedding parties, making Valentines Day cookies every year, serving as a deaconess in the church and comforting us when we were sick.
She did it ALL.
And she did it WELL. Not Perfect but Well.
Who’s to say we can’t?
For 12 years of my adult life I got to do whatever I wanted. My “career” was ministry. I spent so much time building other people’s lives, traveling, going wherever I wanted, living in the hardest darkest places and then I realized that I was getting burnt out.
I needed to place emphasis on caring for myself, placing my family first in a real way, then ministry and career next.
It’s easy to say I’m doing that but I’m not eating well, don’t say no to peoples needs because I want to make everyone else happy and don’t make doctors visits or at least try to accomplish family goals actively am I really placing family first?
My answer was a resounding No.
Sure I went on vacations and had a weekly date night but there was no separation between ministry/my career and family life. The lines were blurred so much that I often went without or was on edge way too much!
It wasn’t healthy.
For me, this happened to be with ministry. For others it may be a job or even a business.
But you are worth it. Your spouse is worth it. Your children are worth it.
And out of the overflow of those healthy relationships, a healthier version of ministry can occur.
This is HOW you do it All. Placing the first things first leaves you with whatever time you have left over and then you can pray about what to do with that time girl!
And it makes things so much easier.
You aren’t doing way too much.
You’re doing what you are called to do!
We were never meant to save the world but to be there for the people to whom He’s called us to add value.
This may not seem exciting or valuable in our modern world but it is in His eyes!
And it keeps us healthy as we live our purpose.
It keeps us from people pleasing.
It keeps us yielded to an audience of One’s desires.
There is a lady I really admire who did this well! Her name is Mary.
Come on, you’ve heard of her.
Mary was all about that life. The Mom Life.
She was young and inexperienced but she had a heart after God.
And she raised The Man. Who Saved the World 🌍.
His name is Jesus.
It’s more than a Bible story. We tell at Christmas around a tree 🌲. Full of Gifts 🎁.
It’s a way of life.
God is raising up women like Mary who know they are Blessed to Be Called into Motherhood, into the Secret Place, into the Home-
Who confidently look at one another and do this:
And she exclaimed with a loud cry, “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb!” (Luke 1:42)
We are Blessed to Have these Children!
Here’s a few more Scriptures to Inspire you as a Boss-Mom:
3 Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him. 4 Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. 5 Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.
5 Then Esau looked up and saw the women and children. “Who are these with you?” he asked. Jacob answered, “They are the children God has graciously given your servant.”
9 He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the LORD.
2 Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.
These children are such a blessing! And one day, who knows, they may be caring for you. They may be fighting for you!
I don’t think anyone is going to be saying, “Man, I wish I didn’t spend so much time with my kids when they were little. I wish I didn’t have those memories I can never get back.”
We will all be happy that we spent the time to invest in these little humans, to help them become powerful contributors to society.
And we will be praised because of it.
So. To the Home I give my first dedication, my time, my worth. It will be worth it in the end.
Even if you have a job, are an entrepreneur or have a calling somewhere else I know it can be hard mom.
But I’m here to simply remind you, it’s worth it in the end to get support, find friends, try to make some time to refresh so you can be your best for yourself, your God, your family!
Here’s a few thoughts to consider:
1. Are you getting some time to pray and read your Bible? Tip: Do this with your kids, listen to podcasts as you go, read your Bible (even if it’s a kids Bible for now) with your kids and get what you get out of it, use your mental strength to memorize Scriptures you post on your fridge. You may not have to compartmentalize quiet time, how can you streamline it all together? Think, smarter not harder.
2. How can you make daily tasks more fun? While your kids are napping or in bed, would you enjoy painting a wall, doing a fun diy project like spray painting an old piece of furniture, cooking a quick fun meal you found on Pinterest, reading a magazine or watching your favorite show while you do laundry? How can you make daily tasks fun adding music, tv shows, and activities into your routine?
3. Is God calling you to do both? Career and Mom Life? You’re a Mom-Boss. Who can you ask for help? A local teen to baby sit, help meal prep, clean a room for a small fee? A family member coming over to help out? A friend who loves to meal prep, interior decorate or style outfits?
Look for the Helpers, they’re always somewhere nearby!
Ok that’s it moms, let’s get it! We can do this with Jesus’ on our side💜💜💜
If you haven’t yet, check out my book Free to Be You it will inspire you to live freely in every season of your life and find life purpose. It’s packed with Scriptures so you can pull some and post them on your fridge or bathroom mirror to do daily declarations!
Also, our churches Convergence Church meets every Sunday at 960 Martin Luther King Drive SW Atlanta, GA! I want to invite you out you are welcome anytime!