Women Archives - Jade Lee

The results of making priorities right is that now I'm living the dream! It can happen for anybody who believes and focuses.

How to Flourish in Life

July 20, 2017/0 Comments/in Infertility, Spiritual, Women /by Jade Lee

Recently I was given the opportunity to speak at a conference in TX about how to flourish in every area of life, even when it does not feel like you are flourishing at all. This topic was really real to me after coming out of a 12 year battle with infertility. I really had to learn how to do this well to keep my peace through those years.

Maybe you’re not in a dry place where you feel like giving up or want to quit or don’t know which way to turn. Maybe you are happily living your life and seeing answers to prayer everywhere. Either way, these principles are the ones I turn to when I’m feeling great or feeling low because they keep me stable no matter what is going on around me.

Here’s what I told the ladies at the conference, and they were an assorted bunch with all types of stories we could probably write books about so I thought it may be relevant to share what I said with you too!

Preaching in TX was so much fun and a dream come true, can’t wait to share another moment like this with more women! They were a beautiful group of women and it was such an honor.

My life goal is to Inspire, Encourage and Transform other’s lives. So that’s what this message is all about. It’s about helping us find the inspiration to have greater life purpose, to hear words that lift us up and to find the answers that get us unstuck in the stuck places of life.

If you want more inspiration or to hear my backstory you can read it in my previous blog on how I got pregnant after 12 years of trying. I think that will be great to read as an extra boost before digging into this post but either way let’s get into it…

The first thing I want you to know is that flourishing has not been easy for me, it’s been a super hard battle. I’m not one of those people who is naturally a non-worrier or gifted in being positive all the time. This takes a consistent and focused effort for me to find that happy place.

So if you don’t always feel like you are on top of the world, I get it. It’s a discipline that comes easier for some of us than others.

This is us, the Lees, before we got pregnant. We were still Waiting on God and He was teaching me how to Flourish.

I remember a time when I was sitting in our living room parsonage (house attached to our church) next to a newly pregnant girl, wanting to relate to her so badly. But feelings of inadequacy began to battle my confidence, Can i do this? What do I really know about pregnancy? I haven’t been able to get pregnant for years. Will she trust me as her pastor’s wife or spiritual leader?

This is the parsonage I lived in while helping people downtown. It is still one of my favorite places in the world!

The war was intense.

Anything but being in this situation, a doula role, would have seemed like a better pick for me!

But this is where God had me, serving in the place of my greatest pain and need.

As we began to talk it didn’t get better, in fact, she confirmed her distrust in me with an awkward response to my question, “So how is the pregnancy going?”

Heart drop!

Ok, so next topic. I moved on quickly to other areas of life after seeing how guarded she was in this area, changing to subject to something else. This was not easy.

This was 9 or 10 years in and inside, I was a wreck. Behind the scenes…I had multiple surgeries, challenging diet changes and frustrating doctor visits I sure couldn’t afford.

In the forefront, I had to remain “strong” for the congregation, though my health took second place, and my heart was desperately burnt out.

The Good News is…

In this hard, dry place I learned to be content, to be happy, to see the good, to look for any glimmer of hope and to FOCUS on what was going right.

The Good News is…

This was not the End!

A few years before the end something happened. And it happened inside of me. I began to realize that I wasn’t called to suffer this way. I was called to Love God and Love Others as I Love Myself. I was missing one piece. I was not loving myself well! I was not flourishing. I was giving myself away on the altar of sacrifice while my own family and health was on the back burner.

Sometimes, being at our end is a hint to the need for major life changes. I needed to put my health at the forefront. I needed to create more income. Get insurance. Move to a safer area. Set boundaries with church member’s access to me.

But people would think I was selfish, no longer in ministry, no longer serving them. They didn’t know what I was going through behind the scenes and I was doing stuff GOD didn’t call me to do in the first place.

At the end of the day was I going to please people OR GOD? I chose GOD!

As I chose Him my life began to change and I began to THRIVE.

I don’t want you to think everything is perfect now because then I’d be leading you into chasing impossibility or looking for perfection.

I’m still in the process of change, but my life is much more balanced and God keeps showing me when I’m doing too much for others to care for myself or family.

As all this got back into place, I got pregnant and am now 6 months full of a bundle of joy! That flourishing came because I chose to Love God and Love Others as I Love Myself!

Here’s me a few months and five months preggo. The results of making priorities right is that now I’m living the dream! It can happen for you too as you make a few adjustments. It might seem really hard at the time but after away it will seem natural and the pay off is worth it!

The secret is, you and I, we were Made to Flourish. So if we aren’t we ask the question, “What do I need to change God?” “What in my mindset can adjust?” “What in my relationships could be more balanced?”

Am I trying to please everyone else so much that I can’t meet my basic needs?

Then we Let Go. Of the past. Of people’s opinions. Of potentially disappointing others. And we run toward to new us that He shows us.

We were Made to Flourish so if we aren’t all we have to do is adjust a few things, sometimes a lot of things (let’s be real) and then we’re back into a great place again.

Ps 92:12 says The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree: he shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon.

There’s a lot I could teach on about this whole palm tree example and being a cedar and flourishing and Lebanon and being righteous…you get the point. But I’m not going to do all that right now because it’s just too much.

I’ll just leave you with 3 Mental Focal Points from this Scripture, to keep your mind on when you are trying to flourish:

You are Righteous. Righteous means you are free from guilt or sin (in the Webster’s Dictionary). This means you are right with God. But how could you say that Jade, if only you knew what I did today, yesterday, last year. I get it. I feel the same way about myself. Ultimately we are right with God because of His Son, Jesus Christ, not because of our own actions good or bad. We can’t make ourself right with Him by doing a lot of good for other people even though I’m sure He appreciates it. And we can’t make ourself right with Him by feeling guilty or beating ourselves up. We are right because He says we are right and that’s it!
I know I said it before but You are Made to Flourish. Flourish means to bud, sprout, shoot, bloom, blossom, spread, break out, break forth, spring abundantly. This is one of my favorite quotes. I saw it again right before I went to share this in Texas, on an outdoor garden sign right outside of my hotel. Isn’t that crazy! There it was, the word BLOOM. BLOOM WHERE YOU ARE PLANTED.

Wherever He has placed you, the family you are in, the marriage you’re in, the children you have, the money you have, the home you live in, what you’re good at, BLOOM RIGHT THERE with what you have. That’s one of the major keys to flourishing, when we have this in focus.

(add video of me opening my new book or holding it in my hand, blooming where I am planted)

3. Your Mistakes are Stepping Stones to Your Destiny. As you are blooming you will make mistakes, we all do and it’s okay. As long as we don’t get stuck on the mistakes we make and let others keep us there. We have to move on at some point and learn from the past in life, ministry, marriage, being parents, sometimes we feel guilt or shame or unworthy but this does not disqualify us. It just adds to why we are so relatable to others that God wants us to talk to. If I can write words of hope anyone can. I’ve messed up a lot which means I’ve learned a lot but I don’t share because I’m perfect, I share because I’m His and I’m called.

I was always called to preach, to inspire people, to get up in front of audiences but noticed a battle trying to stop me every time I was put in front of a group of people, even as a young age. Inside I was bold, expressive and loved attention but outside it was so hard to get that to the world. Usually we get signs of our callings early on and may be hindered, but in the end, we win and we will blossom right where we are.

Ok so that’s all I’m going to share from what I told my new friends in TX but I’ll leave you with 7 more thoughts that are really practical and hopefully you can try one or two of them to help you BLOOM:

Compassion Over Comparison. It’s easy to start comparing your impact, how good of a mom you’re being, your marriage and personality to other women. Geesh, we get caught up in comparing ourself to other people’s LIFE and this trap brings us down quick! But when we live in vulnerable community it’s easier to see that all women have life challenges behind the scene.
Count Your Blessings: Thank God for what you have with a joy list. I started doing this in college and it only takes 2 minutes to write down everything you’re happy for, but I always run out of time because that list is usually way longer than what’s bothering me.
Work with What You have: When’s the last time you’ve done a Gift Inventory? What is your gift? What resources do you already have? Crafting, Writing, Speaking, Social Media, Fashion, A Camera, Churches in your Care, A team of Women? Remember, your impact doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Let’s make the most of what we have.
Find a Strong Support System: Pray for a mentor or a friend that understands you, women that won’t add to your burden but will “get you” without judging your situation.
Set Healthy Boundaries: What areas do you need to say not to, write a list of what you spend your time doing in ministry and ask God if that call has expired or if there’s things He never wanted you to do. I had to realize I can’t step in proxy of God for every need. Some of it He’ll meet directly or send someone else to meet.
Do Fun Stuff: When I share this with women they start shouting lol. But for real, go shopping, try new recipes, watch a movie, get your nails done with a friend, get a massage. Your entire life should not just be work, work, work. Let’s add some play!
Take Vacations and Weekend Getaways: For Marriage, Family, Girlfriend Trips. It takes some planning and maybe a few less trips to fast food restaurants but girl you’ll be happy with drink in your hand, the sun shining on your new bathing suit and a shore line as far as your eye can see!

And there you have it, my story plus some really practical ways to Bloom right where you are, even if that is was a wilderness!

Hugs, Sweetness and Lots of Love,

Your Friend~Jade

By the way…I have a new book coming out in September called The Ferguson Dilemma. It will be available on this website, www.JadeLee.org and it’s own website (coming soon). I can’t wait to share this with you all it has so much information on how to heal, especially in the area of understanding people who are different than you ethnically!

Here’s a pic of it!

Also, my husband Corey and I will be speaking at Imagine 2017 in September. If you’re in ministry this is a conference that you don’t want to miss! This is where I’ll be releasing my book for the first time too, so exciting! It’s in Chattanooga, TN and it’s $75 to register but worth every penny.

Here's a great website that helped in my journey to holistic health. And the link to the testimonial that made me cry

How I Got Pregnant After 12 Years Plus Diet Tips

June 4, 2017/5 Comments/in Family, Infertility, Personal Growth, Pregnancy, Spiritual, Women /by Jade Lee

If you are trying to get pregnant, fighting infertility, or to keep hope in regaining your health, you can win the battle. The good news is that today I sit here 4 months pregnant and happily in love with my sweet baby girl already! And I want to share with you how.

Here’s a great website that helped in my journey to holistic health. And the link to the testimonial that made me cry when I read it. It’s called: Success Story: After 12 Years of Trying, Jade Conceives! Ok let me stop here come the tears again!

To regain your health there is no one stop shop, magic pill or one size fits all charming solution that works for everyone. But there are principles that can work for us all. Then we begin to pray and hope for specific instructions that work for our particular situation.

I really believe in a holistic approach to health if you want to get better. And not just because of what well documented scholarly books say either. (although that’s completely necessary).

I believe it because it’s the only thing that finally worked for me. So today I’m going to share how I found a real, practical game plan to getting back my life and wellness.

It’s not always easy, happy and may not always seem attainable. Some days will be good, others full of hopeful expectation and others flat out borderline despairing. But if you keep going, stay determined, and take control of your health you will accomplish your goal.

Here we are at our gender reveal party! Corey has been an amazing support this entire time💞💗❤️

(And here’s the Final Reveal: IMG_3049)

The good news is you don’t have to be perfect to do this!

This is what I did: Changed My Diet by Monitoring my Vitamin Levels, Found an Excellent Doctor that I felt 100% Confidence in, Developed a Relaxation and Mental Strength Plan, Removed all Toxins (physical, emotional and even negative, doubtful people from my life), Monitored my Exercise Program and Included a Prayer/Fasting Journey to Keep My Faith High!

Many of these same principles can work if you are trying to lose weight, have a healthy full term pregnancy, avoid a health crisis, develop consistent spiritual health or overcome bad habits.

No matter what you are facing there is hope by 1. Gaining Control of Your Diet, 2. Developing Spiritual Wellness, and 3. Finding a Healthy Relaxation/Mental Strength Balance.

1. Lets talk first about what we eat. We’ve all heard the saying, “You are what you eat!” Well, guess what, it’s really true. We will get out what we put in. But let’s be real. This is not going to happen over night.

It is a consistent, practical focused effort that makes this work. And you don’t have to be perfect either, just do your best to stay on target. If you go astray, dust yourself off and go at it again.

Sometimes it can be tempting to just say, “This isn’t working. I don’t even see a difference. Why keep trying?” But changing your diet will restart your body and you can train your palette to like foods you didn’t like before.

You can find creative ways to cook what you do like and get better at it; this is hard work but you are definitely worth it!

One great way to get in needed vitamins- a dark leafy diet, was to drink my veggies. Juicing became a great way to consume a whole bag of lettuce in once cup. There are great tasting juices you can try at home!

Keep your eyes on the finish line so you motivate yourself to keep going. Eating includes what you drink. Drinking water is good for us all.

The daily recommended intake is eight, 8 ounces glasses of water a day. If you are like me and trying to balance your hormones it’s really important to avoid plastic bottles water (due to estrogen like properties that can filter into water from plastic) and tap water that can include pesticide chemicals.

It’s debatable what’s the best water (I’m even guilty of drinking from bottles) but distilled and reverse osmosis water has been highly recommended by major fertility natural health leaders. I drank water like crazy and still do now that I’m pregnant.

At first it felt like a lot but eventually my body actually craved it when I didn’t get enough. One time after surgery to adjust vital reproductive organs, I gained a really bad sinus infection trying everything you could think of, including the Neti Pot Nasal Rinse (which works great and is all natural!).

It may sound extreme but there were times the Neti Pot kept my sanity lol. Try it out if you’re experiencing congestion or want to clean out your passages. You can even use it while pregnant avoiding decongestant medications!

But months went by and my breathing wasn’t getting better!😩 You know what finally worked? Plain old WATER! Who what have thought Water could be so powerful?

So no matter your condition, keep in mind with me the natural healing properties of water. Harvard University even did a study on the importance of water finding that it effects the vitality of every organ in the human body:

“Water keeps every system in the body functioning properly. The Harvard Medical School Special Health Report 6-Week Plan for Health Eating notes that water has many important jobs, such as:carrying nutrients and oxygen to your cells
flushing bacteria from your bladder
aiding digestion
preventing constipation
normalizing blood pressure
stabilizing the heartbeat
cushioning joints
protecting organs and tissues
regulating body temperature
maintaining electrolyte (sodium) balance.”

The moral of the story is we all need water to function properly, have energy and keep this amazing system working. Once I got that down I also avoided harmful levels of sugar, processed or artificial sugars.

I replaced them with stevia (in my warm Maca drinks, a powerful fertility herb), honey and maple syrup. (Caution when you get pregnant, stevia has not been proven as safe for pregnant women by the FDA).

If you every look on the back of a fruit juice container you’ll notice it has A LOT of sugar so I even cut those to boost my immune system. I also avoided soy, which has estrogen like propeties that throw off our bodies balance as women.

And one of the most important diet changes that I made was only eating grass fed or organic meats. Be careful because the food industry has learned how to creatively say there are no antibiotics fed to their animals but these animals have not been raised in a way that avoids chemicals completely or live in really tight environments that are stress producing.

Hormones fed to animals can also create too much estrogen in a woman trying to conceive also hindering needed balance.

Going on dates and doing fun things with your husband is so important even when there are a lot of emotions. Remembering we are always on the same team was so helpful for us when in such a trying time.

Remember, the goal is to find balance in your hormonal system. I have been told by my massage therapist to be careful of too much cheese or milk products which can cause congestion stimulating conditions like PCOS or Endometriosis more so if you have one of these conditions please be careful.

Milk can be replaced with almond milk (check to see if it’s organic) or hemp milk. It’s also important to keep in mind that fat is not bad, it’s getting good healthy fat through (fish like wild, not farm raised Alaskan salmon, cod, and Alaskan halibut).

Also you can get good essential fatty acids from coconut oil (replace cooking oil with it), nuts and seeds. The last tip is that you can remove processed white grains (white rice, pasta and white bread) in exchange for healthier whole grains (whole wheat pasta, quinoa and brown rice).

All of these tips can be used even before you plan to get pregnant to ensure your body is balanced and ready! Even now that I’m pregnant I eat this way with a few modifications to the teas that I consume.

Recommended water filters:

Berkey (as low as $258)

Berkey Water Filter $258

Glass water bottles ($10)

Extra Perk: It’s really important not to skip meals during childbearing years to remain a healthy balance. What helped me most was bringing snacks with me as I went on errands and about my day like: organic granola bars (low in sugar), fruit I could quickly grab (antioxidant fruits are really good for you like strawberries and blueberries), water bottles (always have them with you, you can keep a cooler in the car), your own trail mix (you can make at home), a smoothie or homemade juice, or homemade chips (sweet potato, tortilla, potatoes with skin on). You can use these snack ideas when pregnant as well!

2. Now let’s think about our Spiritual Wellness. I knew the importance of prayer and fasting (it even has medical benefits) but this journey has brought my faith to another level! Faith is the key to getting a breakthrough in any area, including our health.

If I didn’t have a relationship with Christ I don’t know where I would be because it’s so mentally demanding trying to balance all the factors we’re talking about plus real life- work, marriage, volunteering, and family life. It gets real!

I say that to say I can relate to that need for balance. Every woman is different. Some don’t want to pray because it’s hard to talk to God when you know He can change your health but He doesn’t seem to be moving in that way. It can be upsetting. It can be hard to talk to God because of guilt.

Is He punishing me? Is He angry at me? Why is He blessing others but I still haven’t seen my breakthrough?

There were moments I never thought I’d see this day. Fighting to believe was sometimes daily. But that’s a normal part of our faith journey. You’re going to get there💞 And it pains me to know you’re in pain. Keep going sister!

I get it! I’ve had these gut wrenching, honest conversations with God too. And anyone going rough this that says they’ve never been discouraged may be embellishing their story a bit.

But I’ve also learned that reading my Bible, especially the psalms where David discussed how he felt, even if I wasn’t feeling it in the moment increased my hope level. And I learned many lessons including the importance of giving over this need to have children in order to feel complete to God (easier said than done).

I learned to serve others in many ways while I was waiting on my own dreams to come to fruition. I learned to trust Him when He kept giving me promises I just wasn’t seeing and when I had No Idea if it would be another 6 months, year or 3 years (try to avoid thinking about how long it could be, really try).

Praying is all about sharing your real feelings, verbalizing the truth of God’s Promises in the Bible and believing that His Words won’t come back empty. He will do what He said He would do.

My faith was elevated by going on multiple Daniels Fasts where I did not only remove certain foods from my diet which was by the way the first time I saw my hormones really begin to balance and my menstrual cycle come back to normality) but by refocusing on The Truth. It was a fast from doubt, comparison and thinking from the place of lack. I had to believe and only have faith surrounding me.

So I found Scriptures like these to help me:

Isaiah 53:5 – But he [was] wounded for our transgressions, [he was] bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace [was] upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

Psalm 103:2 Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits— 3 who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, 4 who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.

Proverbs 23:7
7 For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.When I was started to slip back into that place of “what if” this never changes, I’m one of the ones that God doesn’t heal, I’m going to be stuck forever.

What if I become like so and so that never had kids.

The reality is that my truth was not based on someone else’s story. So much could be different in their life than mine and just because it happened to them didn’t mean it was going to happen to me.

Every year we start it out with a Daniels Fast. Sometimes the best way to get your breakthrough is to help others get theirs at the same time!

I declared the truth over and over out loud so I could hear it. And I could feel the atmosphere changing around me, I was changing inside.

I could see myself pregnant, whole and happy. It was amazing! We have to remember that we are in a spiritual war but can beat the odds through the power of Gods presence, worship, His Scriptures.

3. And that brings us to having a Life Full of Relaxation/Mental Joy! Being a type A, really driven, motivated personality this was not my top gift. But I had to do this for myself.

Priorities.

God first. Personal Health. Then everything else.

This requires a Huge Lifestyle Change for Me. And as change goes, a lot of Letting Go. You’ll notice that in order to change, sometimes you even have to let go of good stuff, good people to accomplish your goals.

I had a lot of good, well meaning people in my life but some of them just weren’t meant to go on this part of the journey with me. It became clear. I had to give my Best Yes. Here’s a great book that helped me to do that:

At the time I’m writing this it’s about $10 on Amazon and worth the investment! Every penny.

You will learn how to say no to people to say yes to Gods best for you, even if you can’t please them or disappoint them. Then you’ll be freed up emotionally to focus on the most important goal in your life right now: Your Health.

Girl, get an Amazon Prime membership (free trial) and go get it now you won’t regret it! I prayed a prayer and finally started listening to my gut. Some of the most important people in my life at the time were just not healthy.

And so I allowed God to create the space needed for me to get into my little faith bubble. Gossip, Jealousy, Distractions and People that pull on you constantly without Gratitude or the Ability to Visualize the future you God has shown you can Drag you Down and keep you in a pit of doubt.

People that blame you for your condition and don’t have grace can cause you to be thrown into condemnation. Fight girl! This is your life, your health, your destiny, your future and You Are Worth saying yes to what’s best even if it means not being able to please everyone around you.

Follow the signs He gives you without shame or apology. This is not bitterness or unforgiveness it is a wise guarding of your precious soul!

(Disclaimer: If you are married go get counseling and professional help, you’re in a covenant meant to last and divorce is not God’s first best. He can change the situation).

Once these toxic relationships were removed I had to Do Some Things Different. My plan included all natural Epsom Salt baths, listening to faith filled worship music like Hillsong or Bethel, writing out my feelings in a journal, getting weekly massages for a season (I did fertility massages and it helped realign my uterus), resting when my body told me to (I would literally take naps whenever, trying my best to avoid the faulty mindset that I was being lazy) and finding out what I enjoyed to do (spending time with my hubby, having long girl talks with positive trusted friends that wouldn’t judge me, walking around a shopping mall).

I fully believe that all of this made me healthy. Mind, Body and Soul. I could feel the tensions around me being removed as I made decisions that led me one step closer to freedom.

It was worth all the challenging situations, hurtful separations and learning to cook everything from scratch! And I know you can do it too! I believe in you! Now go get out there and chase your dream; its God that gets your pregnant and gives you health💞 Every step you take is one step closer to the other side😊😭🎀

I want to say thank you if you were one of those people who secretly pushed prayers through for me or cried for me or encouraged me…even if you had a moment of good wishes for me. You’re the people I’m forever grateful for; it’s been a journey, The journey of a lifetime.

How to Dress Cute, Modest and Classy

March 8, 2017/1 Comment/in Fashion, Women /by Jade Lee

What immediately pops up in your mind when you think of the word modesty? An outdated outfit and frumpy clothes? Or a sober heart, not too proud or overly excessive?

Do you think balance or restriction from being who you really are? Maybe some of us think, “That’s not for me. I’m just not there yet.” And that’s okay that we know how we feel and where we are…we are all entitled to start where we are judgment free!

GOD knows and He will take us in our current state, gradually adding His own convictions for each one of us.

God will take us in our current state, gradually adding His own convictions for each one of us.

For example, when I was in my early twenties my modesty journey began. I was so excited to follow the Lord in every area of my life, that when He began to convict me about certain pieces of clothing in my wardrobe, I said, “Lord, this is so hard, but okay.”

In this look I took a dress and put a sheer top under it to make it more suitable for a church environment. It fit my classic modest style type.

Clothes that were a bit too tight here or there began to escape my wardrobe.

Clothes that weren’t reflective of what I wanted to represent began to be filtered.

And then I came across a woman of God teaching on Deuteronomy 22:5. I read the Scripture. I studied it. I thought about it deeply. Today it’s fully how this one Scripture on, you guessed it, the clothes we wear has become one of the most controversial Scriptures for Christian women.

But I was convinced God was convicting me to wear only skirts. The key words here are, “Convicting me.” This was a personal conviction God gave to me.

And I saw the benefit of it in my life. I dressed up a lot more, explored more feminine options and no longer was attracting the type of attention I didn’t want from guys.

For a season, this was also very helpful for me to overcome superficiality, finding my beauty in my inward man, not the outward. But over time I felt the Lord begin to release me from that conviction.

And here’s another dress I adapted into a top with skinny jeans to add a modest approach…

What I did wrong was place too much of my zeal and excitement about this life change on others. It was important not to place my conviction on others or teach it as if it was a law of God. It was also important not to make this conviction a source of “holiness” or “arriving in God.”

What I did wrong was place too much of my zeal and excitement about this life change on others. It was important not to place my conviction on others or teach it as if it was a law of God.

But on the other hand, I know what it’s like to be persecuted for my personal convictions, even by those I never mentioned skirts to! Please don’t do this to your friends or loved ones. It has developed a great deal of compassion in my heart towards those who God leads to break cultural norms.

Placing our convictions on others is a danger many new believers experience as the excitement of hearing God’s voice can cause us to miscalculate the purpose of that experience–forcing it on our friends and family–not just in how we dress, but in what we watch, where we go, and what we eat. This creates a haughty attitude and a “better than thou” demeanor that repels others from us. Learn from my experience, this is not a healthy way to go and it stifles our relationships.

But on the flip side, if someone you know develops a new conviction, please do your best to respectfully support what God has told them to do–Remember, this is the same God that told Samson to wear his hair in locks and never cut his hair on a Nazarite vow. The vows people make with God should be respected and honored. For me, I see my period of wearing skirts as a personal vow between me and the Lord.

If someone you know develops a new conviction, please do your best to respectfully support what God has told them to do

An outward expression of obeying what He asked me to do. And I am grateful to say God led me through a 13 year season of embracing this conviction, whether others were pleased or not. I was content to please God.

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10

At the end of those 13 years the Lord gave me a sense of peace about wearing pants again (which was not new to me, it’s the way I grew up for many years). It was the time and He confirmed why to me through various means.

I was reminded of Peter, who’s conviction as a Jew was to not eat meat. Then, after living out this lifelong conviction, God gave him a vision of eating “all” of His creation. Was Peter wrong to be on a mainly plant based diet before this “discovery”? No way! He was following God’s law.

But Peter was about to reach the Gentiles. And he was experiencing the freedom to obey God’s voice, which is what Christianity is all about!

So with all these thoughts on real life lessons about convictions, let’s talk about what modesty really is. First, it will help to understand that modesty is not our own idea. It comes from the Bible. And though it may look different for each lady, it is important for it to be a part of our lifestyle.

This word appears in 1 Timothy 2:9 and 1 Timothy 3:2. It’s the word kosmios meaning well arranged, seemly, modest.

I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes 1 Timothy 2:9

In the dictionary, it means

“placing a moderate estimate on one’s abilities or worth; neither bold nor self-assertive : tending toward diffidence” or “limited in size, amount, or scope a family of modest meansb : unpretentious a modest home”

So modesty is about being self controlled in our attitude, not putting on an act for someone else (pretentiousness) or going over the top with something. We can be modest in our thoughts, in our speech, in our actions, and in how we dress.

Modesty is about being self controlled in our attitude, not putting on an act for someone else or going over the top with something.

Modesty is not just about how we dress. It comes from the realization that we are where God chooses to reside and because of that we want to walk in the Spirit. We want to respect His presence. We want to be humble in all that we do. This comes from the heart.

1 Corinthians 6:19 says Our body is a temple of God. We want to represent Him well.

Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own 1 Corinthians 6:19

Let’s keep in mind that, as Christians, what is in the heart is what is most important, not the outward appearance. And we don’t win God’s approval by how we dress. We are justified by Jesus Christ alone!

1 Timothy 2:8-10 give us the principle behind an inward focus, not an outward one alone. If we begin to put how we look on the outside (whether modest or inmodest) before God who is in our temple, we’ll probably find ourselves in bondage.

Modest doesn’t have to be frumpy or colorless it can be stylish and fun!

Is what I’m wearing reflecting Godliness? Am I wearing this to attract the right attention or to get a lustful stare, the attention of some guy I don’t even know? Am I wearing this to help heal insecurities?

As we know our heart, we focus on ways we need healing we will realize why we do what what do. We will discover our motives. God can help us see this and this is the Holy Spirit’s role to personally convict us. If He convicts you it will lead to freedom, not a sense of negativity or bondage.

Another principle that I like to apply is knowing my “areas”:

Is my chest showing, cleavage becoming a distraction? This is not a hard and fast rule, but we want to keep our private parts discreet for our current or future hubby if possible. Pray about this and ask the Lord how He feels. He will show you where He wants you to draw the line.

Am I depending on the praise of people to give me identity? If I wear something cute, I get a bunch of compliments and I feel better. There’s nothing wrong with that but the core of who we are comes from who Jesus says we are in the Bible…fearfully and wonderfully made.

Many times we are told as women in the church that we have to dress more modest to protect our brothers and although this does have a role of putting our brother before ourselves, this can also be abused. Men also have to carry their own spiritual responsibility in how they keep their eyes, but are we at least concerned about helping a brother out from stumbling?

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10

By the way, even when we are modest it’s really important that beneath the surface we love ourselves, care for our bodies, try our best–this is not an excuse to go to the other extreme of not putting forth effort to look our best.

Well those are my words on modesty plus here’s a few fashion tips:

There’s a few ways you can “work your own look”:

Know Your Body Type (Are you an apple, pear, hourglass or banana)?
Know Your Style (Are you classic, trendy, bohemian, or dramatic?)
Learn to Love Yourself! Who you are in essence rarely changes.
Learn your Undertone (color) and Color Wheel, are you a winter, spring, summer or fall?
Explore a Few Trends- Certain cuts, looks and even colors could be on trend from year to year. Don’t try to wear all of them lol figure out which ones look best on you Here’s a few for 2017:

I’m a classic but I do trends and chic looks as well. Classic tops, bottoms and earrings never go out of style! You can still have fun by mixing colors and trends.

Here I’m wearing a classic white collard skirt and pencil skirt but mixed up with a trendy fur vest!

Here I’m wearing a classic outfit with bell sleeves, a current trend. You can google trends for 2017 to see the last ones!

And here I am wearing a classic a line cut dress with a pop of color. All classic though- straight lines etc. I like skirts and dresses that flare on me since I’m a pencil/banana and don’t have many curves lol

And here’s a link to natural makeup options that don’t have any preservatives or chemicals that will seep into your pores.

Well, I hope this helped you understand a little bit more about modesty and I know you will be well on your way to hear from God for your own modesty journey. But let’s keep in mind that it’s what is in our hearts that matters most!

Love you!

Jade Lee

Rising Women Daniels Fast 2017

December 21, 2016/1 Comment/in Spiritual, Women /by Jade Lee

Your purpose as a wife, mother, business woman or entrepreneur is right around the corner. Can you see it?

You may be wondering why we are doing the Rising Women 21 Day Daniel Fast and that is a good question. I began asking Women Everywhere to Join me in 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting for the Month of January 2016 and you responded! We broke through in prayer for the entire month.

And now we are going to do it again! Many of us are coming out of a season of transition and have many questions as to what to do next, we are entering into a place we have never been, but we are assured that we are right where God wants us; that is why we are seeking Him together for clear vision and purpose. We are determined to rise into our purpose with no hindrances.

This fast has been on my heart for months but now is the time for breakthrough, the season for deliverance and for each one of us to tap into the fullness of what GOD has for us; sometimes this requires both prayer and fasting. If we want to see all that GOD has for us actualized, there are blockages that can hinder us from receiving it in completion.

This is Biblically evident when reading through many accounts with Jesus and those He ministered to throughout His ministry. As believers, we want to follow His instructions and methods of reaching deliverance.

In one specific incident Jesus after healing a young boy from being deaf and mute, His disciples inquisitively asked Him, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?” He told them, “This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting.” (Mark 9:28-29).

You see, there are times in which we can only see breakthrough as we pray and fast.

This is also confirmed as Daniel completes three weeks (21 days) of prayer and fasting. He is visited and told, “Don’t be afraid, Daniel…for from the first day that you purposed to understand and to humble yourself before your GOD, your prayers were heard. I have come because of your prayers. But the prince of the kingdom of Persia opposed me for 21 days.” (Daniel 10:12-13)

Through this passage we can conclude that there are oftentimes spiritual hindrances to our prayer requests. As Jesus revealed to us, we must both pray and fast to bring down certain barriers in intercession.

Both Jesus and Daniel were men of great devotion, consecration, fasting and prayer. Jesus shares that He expects us to pray and fast.

Daniel committed in his heart to not defile his self with the king’s meat (Dan. 1:8) and that is what we will do during this fast. We will separate ourselves from any idols in our lives, knowing our GOD will reveal the deep and hidden things; He knows what is in the darkness, and light dwells in Him (Daniel 2:22).

I began this fast to help me remove personal barriers such as praying for my future children and the removal of fertility blockages. It is also a way for me to detox myself spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physiological as I start this New Year. Will you join me in seeing GOD move through us and in us like never before? Let’s believe together for Healing, Dreams Fulfilled and Awakened Hearts! 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting, January 10-31, 2017.

Daily Prayer Schedule:

1/10-1/31, Every day on prayer line 6am, On Periscope Every Monday at 6am

Tuesday, 1/10- The Heart Detox: Cleansing Our Hearts from Hindrances to our BreakthroughWednesday, 1/11- The Power of Yadah Praise: Entering into a Heavenly Place through Praise

Thursday, 1/12- Warfare Prayers: Awakening the Warrior in Your Heart

Friday, 1/13- Remember the Dream: Redigging What God has already Spoken

Saturday, 1/14- Praying Through Vision: Praying through the Promises of God for your Life

Sunday, 1/15- Writing the Promise: Prophetic Writing to Seal the Word

Monday, 1/16- Hope Deferred: Dealing with the 3 D’s- Depression, Doubt and Delay

Tuesday, 1/17- Wearing the Coat of Joseph: Immersing Yourself in Vision and Favor

Wednesday, 1/18- Praying Through Dreams: When Dreams Point to Purpose

Thursday, 1/19- About the Father’s Business: Praying for Entrepreneurs and Business Women to Arise

Friday, 1/20- The Discipline to Lead: Honing the Skill of Hard Work and Discipline

Saturday, 1/21- Hard Work Ethics: When Passion Fails and Determination Wins

Sunday, 1/22- Organizing the Plan: Praying for the Gift of Administration and Keys to Order

Monday, 1/23- Childhood Dreams: Discovering Purpose through Childhood Clues

Tuesday, 1/24- The Emerging Wife: Praying for Singles, Unmarried and Aspiring Wives

Wednesday, 1/25- The Companion: Embracing our Calling as Wives

Thursday, 1/26- Household Matters: What Matters First is First

Friday, 1/27- The Mother in Me: Understanding Spiritual Motherhood

Saturday, 1/28- The Mother in Me: Purpose as a Biological or Adoptive Mother

Sunday, 1/29- Your Prayers Matter: Taking Your Stance as a Praying Woman

Monday, 1/30- Making a House a Home: The Power of Hospitality

Tuesday, 1/31- Celebration/Testimony Call

Three Ways to Wear Olive Green Jeans for the Fall

November 20, 2016/0 Comments/in Fashion, Women /by Jade Lee

Fall is by far my favorite season of the year! I had so much fun pairing together different tops with this one pair of olive green jeans…I’ve always loved fall colors, navy blues, browns, ivories, hunter greens and my favorite- deep burgundy reds. And they are in my color wheel, these are the colors I dress with, decorate with and am naturally drawn too. Knowing your season can be so helpful in knowing what colors work best for you too, I’ll do a fashion post on that soon!

Here I have three different looks with the same basic foundation of high rise, green riding pants and an essential white tank. It is so key to have these essentials in our wardrobes that we can pair with other more trendy pieces. They complete our wardrobe. Then we can dress up our looks with accessories and shoes or in this case riding boots.

These looks all have an earthy, relaxing feel to them while still appearing to have a finished touch. By changing jackets and in the second look a sweater, these three outfits have taken on their own personality while remaining classic and timeless.

In the coming days, I can’t wait to share more about the basics of dressing for your own body type, knowing the colors that work best for you and being the best version of yourself as possible! Hope you are enjoying the fall season as much as I am…and looking forward to Christmas holidays as well! xoxo

Look One: Jacket: Forever 21 Tank: Target Jeans: Bloomingdales Necklace: Macys

Look Two: Hat: Nine West Sweater: Madewell Boots: Enzo Angiolini

Look Three: Jacket: Urban Outfitters Necklace: Loft

The Single and Happy Live, Saved and In College- Episode #1

November 8, 2016/0 Comments/in College, Women /by Jade Lee

In College? Living for Christ? Feeling alone? Introducing JLO’s newest segment “Saved and in College”. Watch college student EdLeea Brewster as she encourages, motivates, and inspires girls to live for Christ with purpose while in college.

EPISODE #1- The Single and Happy Life

Being single isn’t always the easiest thing to do, especially when you are in college. You can easily feel like the outsider when everyone around you is in romantic relationship. Singleness is beautiful. It is a great time to serve the LORD wholeheartdly! Watch this video to be encouraged.

Naturally Preparing your Body for Pregnancy

October 6, 2016/1 Comment/in Pregnancy, Women /by Jade Lee

I’ve been blessed to help quite a few women pre, during and postpartum to find that we need A Clear Plan before getting into the world of pregnancy; this should help you prepare your body for pregnancy even before you are pregnant. It is so reassuring for these mamas to know that they are educated on what is happening to their body and how to respond to the sudden changes they are experiencing. Unfortunately, as a pastor’s wife, I have been through the process of walking with a number of couples through unexpected miscarriages, pregnancy complications and panic attacks.

This is a very sensitive issue and something that I hold in confidentiality with these couples, so I will not provide any “real-life” examples, but it has been on my heart for quite some time to share what I have learned through walking with these couples and my own research in helping “keep them pregnant.” None of this information is to replace or negate what your practitioner advises you to do, only to supplement and provide a natural, reassuring perspective that can further empower you as a mama or mama-to-be.

The first area of concern for me is that many times I have found women’s bodies and minds are not prepared for pregnancy. There is a common belief that “I will just get pregnant, grab a pre-natal vitamin off a grocery store shelf, get to my doctor, take a blood test to confirm and keep it moving.” But when there is not enough body fat to maintain the pregnancy, the body has toxins causing a hormonal imbalance, or the body is not getting enough healthy nutrients to keep mama and baby healthy, this can result in an unwanted crisis. Unfortunately, this risk is not always shared with mama until it is too late. So, what can you do to prepare your body for that day when you find out you are pregnant?

This is important if you are married, trying to get pregnant, or using no means of protection and may get pregnant. Let’s give our body what it needs in a preventative way so that we can have healthy, full term deliveries.

#1 Find a Whole Food, Good Quality PreNatal Vitamin

There is only one downside to a whole food prenatal, it is more expensive, but the cost is worth every penny when you consider its benefits. This is different than a prescription or over the counter manufactured prenatal. Instead, it consists of all natural ingredients and vitamins from their natural source. The prescription prenatals can be very hard on some women’s digestion, cause nausea, heartburn, indigestion and constipation. It may not be right for all women. Doing your own research and discovering what is best for your body in consultation with your doctor is helpful.

Prenatal vitamins are helpful because the baby pulls from mama’s nutrients to get her own taking care of, leaving mama depleted of daily intake if not eating enough or supplementing. This can cause more nausea, fainting or other complications (including miscarriage or the baby not growing at a recommended rate). To ensure both baby and mama get all they need I have included a few prenatal vitamin options to supplement your daily food intake.

A few high quality, whole food prenatal vitamins are:

Baby & Me
Baby and Me is a plant based, vegetable vitamins so you do not have to worry about manufactured items entering your body and it is full of great vitamins for you and your baby, as it’s name suggests. There is also a Herb-Free Version of Baby & Me available (especially important if you are already taking herbs or tonics to support your health). A lot of mamas absolutely love how easy this vitamin is on their stomachs and how they can take it with no worries of a sick tummy! It is also very high in Vitamin D (which helps prevent miscarriage).

Rainbow Light Prenatal One

Another option is Rainbow Light Prenatal One. This 100% vegetarian and natural vitamin has no preservatives and is also vegan. Another perk is you only need one a day to get your daily intake, and it is very light on the stomach due to it’s inclusion of probiotics (good for digestion). It has twice the amount of the following vitamins as a lot of prenatal vitamins:

iron (good for metabalism and blood cell production),
vitamin D (for mama and baby’s healthy bones and teeth),
vitamin C & A (for skin, eye, immune, brain health, and destressing),
folic acid (to prevent birth defects, help with the baby’s brain and cell development, plus spine growth), and
vitamin B (for energy, cell growth, stress, immune support and more).

#2 A Whole Food, Healthy Diet

Of course, this is only a supplement to eating a whole food, healthy diet, with healthy fats like organic butter, coconut, olive, sunflower and sesame seed oils, fish, nuts, seeds, lots of dark leafy vegetables, and bright, vibrant choices like carrots, tomatoes, and cucumbers. Plus a lot of fruit (think half your plate being full of fruits and vegetables). There are so many new fruits and veggies that you may not have tried yet and can now focus on enjoying.

The key is to snack, snack, snack on healthy foods and meal prep ahead of time so you don’t run out of food and go crazy at a fast food restaurant! To avoid preservatives, try organic, grass fed, farm fresh food from the farmer’s market or the organic section of your grocery store. This will protect both you and baby from unwanted harmful substances.

This is your chance to taste the rainbow. Think about beautiful colors, many beautiful colors you are taking into your body on a daily consistent (never skipping meals) basis. Try some of the foods on this rainbow chart to get you started:

There are so many healthy options out there, a few tips on snacks: slice oranges, apples, kiwi, peaches and bring them to work with you. Grab a bunch of grapes and throw them in your lunch bag. Keep a cooler in the back of your car/trunk full of yummy homemade smoothies (by the way this is a good snack option), lots of water, and your fruit.

And mama’s protein intake is really important too. You can get this from grass fed meats (lower in fat plus essential fatty acids) and cold water fish (look for “wild” fish, rather “farm raised”in grocery store- like cod, Alaskan salmon, and Alaskan halibut), lentils, beans and vegetables like kale and broccoli. Try to get a balance of both meat and vegetable proteins in your meals.

A few tips: Low zinc is believed to cause miscarriage (you can always get your blood levels checked prior to pregnancy) and the right amount of vitamin B12 can help prevent miscarriage by strengthening mama’s endometrium lining where the egg is fertilized. Zinc: shrimp, lamb, pumpkin seeds, yogurt, turkey, sesame seeds, green peas. B12: Lobster, eggs, liver, crab, fish, beef, lamb, oysters.

Foods to avoid: cold cuts, excess caffeine, soft cheeses, alcohol, don’t go on a low fat diet (you need healthy fats to support your growing baby)

#3 Relaxation Plan

Of course there’s a lot more mama’s-to-be can do to prepare for pregnancy and keep a healthy pregnancy, but for today, we will close this up by talking about the importance of the R&R: Rest and Relaxation. We all need rest, but your body is working twice as hard when pregnant, so you finally have a good excuse for sleeping A LOT.

Sleep– On your left side (your liver is on your right side, this will help avoid pressure on your liver- this can get harder as you get bigger, so just try your best). Try to avoid sleeping on your back because it pressures a lot of organs and can lower circulation.

You can also get a wedge when you get bigger to help with sleep.

Journal– Write down your thoughts, feelings and emotions, your joys and annoyances while pregnant. Doing this can help declutter your mind and give you a sense of needed relief. Taking note of what is causing you to feel stressful in your environment can be really helpful as well.

Relaxing Exercise– There are pregnancy exercises you can do like walking, leaning forward on an exercise ball (think about how much pregnant mamas lean back), and butterflies (remember these cute exercises from when you were a child?).

Prayer and Meditation– Daily spending time praying and meditating on Scripture can help remove fear and increase your faith in a smooth pregnancy. There are so many concerns and questions pregnant mamas may have; having a few Scriptures handy is helpful when we are in uncertain times. This book, Supernatural Childbirth, I did a review on recently is really good to have on hand to help you pray prayers for pre, during and post pregnancy (plus while in labor)!

Best of wishes on your coming baby, or if you’re just really proactive and preventative, I wish you the best on your way to being a mama one day!

Prayer: Father, I thank you for everyone reading this and pray that You will give them the strength they need, the wisdom they ask for and the health You promised that they may have a full term, strong pregnancy, a healthy baby in their loving mama arms. And I pray that they will overcome all fears of the days to come no matter what is in their family history or their own past. They deserve the best because that is what Christ died for. In Jesus’ precious name. Amen.

xoxo,

Jade Lee

A few Mama Scriptures:

You will keep in perfect peace, him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal. Isaiah 26:3

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13

For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14

Yet you brought me out of the womb; you made me trust in you even at my mother’s breast. From birth I was cast upon you; from my mother’s womb you have been my God. Psalm 22:9-10

He will have no fear of bad news; he heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. His heart is secure, he will have no fear; in the end he will look in triumph on his foes. Psalm 112:7

How to Have a Supernatural Childbirth (Book Review)

August 2, 2016/0 Comments/in Infertility, Pregnancy, Women /by Jade Lee

This is one of those books that should be in every woman’s library, even before she is pregnant, Supernatural Childbirth.

I have been meaning to write a book review on this for months now and have finally found the time to squeeze in a few thoughts on a topic that is really special to my heart.

It may seem strange on one hand but very natural on the other that I would write on this topic as someone who has experienced the hard journey of infertility for years. But that is what initially led me to it…I was looking for answers, for a resource I could use to pray over my womb.

And then I found Jackie Mize’s classic book. And it has been a blessing to everyone I have been gifted to mentor over the years.

This book is full of wisdom, personal life stories, prayers and Scriptures you can pray over yourself before, during and post pregnancy. It even includes a section on prayers for the delivery and shares how to overcome fear during the entire experience (which is a major struggle for almost every woman I have walked with through pregnancy).

So far, I’ve gotten a chance to play the role of a pastor’s wife/unofficial doula for 10 babies and we used this book in the process. The woman I worked with would pray these prayers over their womb and we would actually see “Supernatural Childbirths.”

As we prayed, we noticed a trend begin to occur. Seemless childbirths were happening, babies were being born almost completely pain free, the women were giving birth in four hours or less (in most cases) and the nurses were running into rooms in shock!

We knew it was the prayers and mental techniques these women were using.

If that baby was holding on a little too long, as I walked into the room, we would simply pray a strong prayer and shortly thereafter the baby would arrive. One time I prayed a prayer like that, went down to get food for the new mommy and dad, and by the time I returned the baby had already surprise us all with a Very Quick delivery.

Another time, the nurses all came running into the room because they could not believe the woman giving birth did so that calmly, with no pain until she was 10 centimeters dilated.

And the doula exclaimed, “We have to get you all to pray for all of the women we worked with!”

It was an act of God, and His original intention for how childbirth should occur…Before the fall of man, it was not so but due to Genesis 3:16 women begin to experience pain in childbearing:

To the woman he said, “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”

But now that consequence has been broken through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ:

But Christ has rescued us from the curse pronounced by the law. When he was hung on the cross, he took upon himself the curse for our wrongdoing. For it is written in the Scriptures, “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.” Galatians 3:13

If you have experienced a painful delivery or a fearful pregnancy, I would definitely recommend this book. And if you have not experienced a pregnancy yet but are expecting, it is worth the try to read it, it really does make a difference. Thirdly, if you are fighting infertility, many have read this book to take a stance against that struggle spiritually.

But it is more an application that a reading book, so here is the link to begin your prayerful pregnancy journey and best of wishes to your new bundle of joy!

If you have any questions about my experiences using this book for infertility or to help moms please use the comments below or you can email me at info@jadelee.org I really welcome your comments…Thanks!

The Shops Buckhead Atlanta

July 24, 2016/0 Comments/in Fashion, Women /by Jade Lee

This is what weekend’s are made of, opportunities to rest, relax, go shopping and enjoy luxurious scenery! And that’s what you will find at one of my favorite shopping locations in Atlanta’s fine choices- The Shops Buckhead Atlanta have some of the best designer clothiers plus sweet tea and coffee stops. Here’s a few pics from my latest excursion:

Where to buy:

A similar-

White Peplum Dress- White House Black House- $69.99, Monroe & Main– $89.99-$99.99

Gold Open Toe Shoes- David’s Bridal– $39.95, Vince Camuto- $149.95, Kate Spade- $298.00

Classic Brown Tote Bag- Tory Burch- $525.00, Michael Kors- $202.91, BCBG- $57.99

Gold Aviator Sunglasses- RayBan- $150.00, Foster Grant- $20.00

Necklace- J. Crew- $30.00, INC Concepts- $39.95

Umbrella- Bloomingdales Little Brown Umbrella- $32.00

Like-a-Lady Tip: Always Purchase quality over quantity. This means spend more money on real materials such as leather over polyester to invest in bags and shoes that will last for many years. You will save money rather than repurchasing classics repeatedly. Toddles!

The Importance of Friendships in Every Season of Life

July 22, 2016/0 Comments/in Personal Growth, Spiritual, Women /by Jade Lee

“To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

Life is full of seasons and each new season is like a new adventure of unchartered territory that brings with it exciting challenges and opportunities to grow and discover new things about yourself and others.

In any new season it can be a great time of transition, we may be in a new job, new location, or starting a new relationship. Transitions can often be a time of high stress for so many of us because they involve so much that is unfamiliar to us.

I hope to bring encouragement to every single person reading this article that it is possible to navigate new seasons, but only with others by your side.

At a young age I’ve experienced a handful of new seasons, all unique and precious that each taught me something new, yet one thing that remained consistent was my need for a community that was there to support me and provide much needed friendship and fellowship.

The best way I found to make new friends in new seasons or maintain friendships I had already cultivated was to realize the season I was in and to communicate realistic expectations to my friends. Below are seven common seasons many will experience throughout their life, however each person has their unique journey and may not experience every one of these seasons or in this order.

7 Common Seasons of Life:

1. Single and Dependent on Parents and Family (living at home)
2. Single and Partially Dependent on Parents and Family (living away from home, possibly in college)
3. Single and Financially Independent on Parents (living away from home, some call this stage “adulting” or “real life”)

4. Courtship (Pursuing a long term relationship unto marriage)

5. Marriage
6. New Parents
7. Seasoned family

God is so gracious that He offers us wisdom for every season and in fact He’s the one that brings us into new seasons. Daniel tells us, “It is He who changes the times and the epochs; He removes kings and establishes kings; He gives wisdom to wise men And knowledge to men of understanding” (Daniel 2:21).

Our Heavenly Father is the one who is completely sovereign over our lives. He’s the one who “changes the times” of our lives and who can “give wisdom” to us in every season!

Adjusting to new seasons can be difficult, I remember feeling at one point that a new season would begin right when I was getting comfortable with the previous one. Leaning on God and reaching out for help or companionship when I needed it was my saving grace.

From the seasons listed above, here is some practical advice to help in adjusting:

1. Single and Dependent on Parents and Family (living at home)
 There is not as much adjusting in this season since it is the first many of us experience, the best advice I have found is to simply enjoy this season and soak it up, building a strong relationship with each of your family members especially your parents. No matter how old we get we never outgrow our need for our parents.

2. Single and Partially Dependent on Parents and Family (living away from home, possibly in college)
 For so many, college represents the first of many huge transitions in a person’s life. It can be uncomfortable for some of us, but a great way to adjust in this season is to introduce yourself to new people, and try new things. Go to events and games and fully engage your college experience.

3. Single and Financially Independent from Parents (living away from home, some call this stage “adulting” or “real life”)
 Creating a support network of friends, family, and older mentors is invaluable in this season. What helped me the most in this season was realizing how much help I needed and reaching out for it and asking for advice from parents and mentors in my life.

4. Courtship (Pursuing a long term relationship unto marriage)
 Courtship or any relationship with marriage as the end goal is such a great time to build the foundation of friendship with your future spouse and best friend for life. Guidance from older mentors and parents is also great to help adjust and prepare for the next season of engagement and marriage.

5. Marriage
 A great way to adjust in this season is to find other young couples to grow with and older couples to glean from. Read more on making and maintaining friendships in this season in the JLO article, “Why You’ll Always Need Girlfriends, even After the Wedding Day”.

6. New Parents
 This is the stage I find myself in now as the mommy to Elijah, our beautiful one and a half year old son. Being a mom has been one of the most fulfilling and also challenging experiences for me, one that I wouldn’t trade for anything.

More than ever it’s caused me to lean on the support of other older mothers in my life for wisdom and encouragement. I remember when I first came from the hospital, friends came over just to hold Elijah as I took a nap, or to see if I needed assistance on any miscellaneous household chores. It has only been a little over a year but the best way I’ve found to adjust in this season is to reach out to friends and family for support.

7. Seasoned Family
 This is a season I’ve never experienced myself, but have learned from others who have, that a good way to adjust is to keep God at the center of your family and relationships, and to stay connected with others.

I hope this article as helped bring more guidance on adjusting to every season in life and the importance of community and friendships in each season!

What season are you in now and what have you learned about connecting with friends and loved ones? We value your insight and experiences!